Carny Thrills Now Available

I have exciting news. On my visit to the local grocery store last night, I saw a fantastic scene: guess what's popped in to my little neck of the woods? Hint: lights, rides, food on a stick, Velcro shoes. That's right. The carnival is a'comin' to town!

You know these little gypsy mini-fairs--they slink into town in the dead of night, and the following day, where there previously stood only a plot of dirt, some sparse grass and enough dust to put Arizona to shame, is now a world of garish lights, obnoxious carousel music and a passel of workers each sporting shoes with a slap-down-strap and one full set of teeth between them. None of this is meant to be derogatory, of course. I myself have Carny blood that stems back to when I hawked the games at Six Flags over Georgia as the first step in my illustrious career as a professional hawker--the written word having replaced the days of bellowing to overeager kids about the ease of winning these impossible-to-win games while their parents gave me the stink eye for doing so.

For all the cheap thrills and dusty paths created in this gaudy world, I actually love these little carnivals. I don't know if it's the food on a stick, the cotton candy (I'm a sucker for cotton candy), the atmosphere, or the 30 second thrill of taking your life in your hands as you perch atop a ride that could come tumbling down like a Jinga game any second that enchants me most. I do find myself scrutinizing the nuts and bolts that hold these rides together each time I'm in line, however. Is there some sort of Carnival safety department approving the abilities and knowledge of these Carny Ride Engineers who put these things together with just a flashlight and a Leatherman tool? I'm thinking probably so.

So we'll be trotting up to the exposition soon, I feel sure, with $107 for ride tickets, my sweet tooth, and the desire to place my life in the capable hands of my Carny brethren. Bring on the fun!